


the Worse it Gets

by SageMasterofSass



Category: Scrubs (TV)
Genre: Bad Flirting, M/M, Misunderstandings, Trans!JD, Unintentional Transphobia, its been so long since ive rly watched this show tbh, its more than implied at least, protective!Turk, sort of kind of get together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 23:25:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15497121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SageMasterofSass/pseuds/SageMasterofSass
Summary: JD gets tired of being misgendered all the time.





	the Worse it Gets

**Author's Note:**

> hi hello this is my first Scrubs/Jdox work and i literally dropped everything else i was writing just to finish this. i fully blame pcrrycox
> 
> also let it be known that besides like, two episodes ih aven't watched scrubs in FOREVER. hopefully my characterization isn't too far off tho??

He gets fed up somewhere around the second week. It’s honestly amazing that he lasts even that long, but a lifetime of dealing with worse has toughened his skin a great deal.

 

Somewhere in his mind he knows he needs to just pull Dr. Cox aside and talk to him directly about it. But all his brushes with verbal abuse have also left him wary of direct confrontation. So he puts it off, over and over again. Even when Turk, though gritted teeth because he’s always been oh so protective of JD, offers to go with him. Or even do it for him, because Turk is the best of bros like that.

 

JD turns him down. He’d rather do it himself because he knows he and Dr. Cox are going to need to have a good functioning relationship after this, and Turk can be a little caustic on occasion. He means well of course but if he calls Cox a transphobic asswipe that might put a bit of a damper on things. Even if his behavior is a touch transphobic asswipe-y. Or a lot.

 

It’s really weird though, because though Dr. Cox is undeniably an asshole, he’s one of a different flavor than the typical transphobe. He’s dedicated to his job and cares about his patients and always seems to be trying to teach JD an important lesson, even if he purposefully tries to make JD feel about two inches tall while doing it. Also Carla genuinely seems to like him which counts for a lot. Transphobia doesn’t really fit his personality, which makes JD think maybe Cox just…doesn’t know? It’s not like JD keeps his identity as a trans man a secret, but he also doesn’t bring it up all that often, he’s been on hormones for years now, had his top surgery, is even capable of growing a good amount of facial hair. He doesn’t get mistakenly called ma’am in public anymore and nobody slips on his pronouns, which is fucking awesome.

 

So Cox probably doesn’t even know, and JD totally means to pull him aside and talk to him about it. Only he keeps forgetting, or chickening out, and it doesn’t happen. Which just makes the day he blows up even worse.

 

He’s already having a bit of a bad morning. If you count waking up late, skipping breakfast, having someone really rude on a bike run over his foot, __and__ dropping the left over coffee he’d scavenged from the kitchen as just ‘bad’. He’s limping onto the unit simultaneously angry and holding back tears when he hears familiar foot falls heading straight for him.

 

“Elizabeth!” Dr. Cox calls out and that just…it makes everything snap.

 

JD whirls with a ferocity he hasn’t felt in a very long time. “Don’t ever call me that,” he snarls, and he knows he probably looks pathetic. His hair is falling in his face a bit because he didn’t have a lot of time to style it, and he’s red-faced and sleepy and favoring one foot but damn it he will not be dead named in his own place of work!

 

Cox pulls up short, one eye brow raising. The expression on his face tells JD exactly how unimpressed he is right now. His mouth opens, probably to spew some mile long comeback, but JD really isn’t going to take it this morning. 

“No!” he barks, causing the few nurses not already looking their way to jump and glance up. It makes Cox’s jaw snap shut and JD stalks towards him, practically vibrating with anger. “I’ve been taking your shit ever since I got here, but not anymore!” He pokes Dr. Cox in the chest with one finger, because he apparently has a death wish. “Your idea of a joke is stupid and hurtful and, and, what problem do you have with trans people anyways!? I have just as much of a right to be here saving lives as you do, and if you can’t handle then that then just leave me alone or let me work under someone else!”

 

Huffing a little, JD spins on his heel to stalk off down the silent hallway. He can feel the press of so many gazes on him, but he still turns and yells, “And don’t ever dead name me again or I’m reporting you to HR!” because he needs to get that last parting shot in.

 

Cox’s eyes are bright and confused on him, his expression one of naked, open surprise. JD sticks his tongue out at him because even angry he’s still ten at heart, then continues his dramatic exit towards the stairwell which is, thankfully, blessedly empty.

 

Almost as soon as the heavy door closes behind him he can hear the unit erupt into a flutter of chaos, so many voices speaking at once that they echo off the walls. He winces and hopes they remember there are actual patients to take care of. The patients will probably be in on the gossip too here in a few minutes. Hospitals are kind of like high school like that.

 

JD sighs and collapses ungracefully onto the bottom step of the stairs. He puts his head in his hands and rubs tiredly at his eyes because that was…wow. Stupid of him. And also brave, but mostly stupid. He should have talked to Dr. Cox a lot sooner than now, or even taken one of his friends up on their offers to help him with it. He’d just thought it would be better to do it by himself. Instead he’s accused Cox of being a transphobe in front of their entire unit and even though he’s still angry, the sting of his dead name still coursing through him, he can’t help but feel guilty too.

 

The sound of the stairwell door opening has JD jerking his head up, surprised. Dr. Cox slips through it, then closes the door quietly behind himself and JD’s mouth dries up in an instant. He wants to jump to his feet and start apologizing profusely; he wants to storm off up the stairs and tell the asshole not to follow him; he wants to demand what the fuck Cox is doing here. In the end he just sits there like a deer caught in headlights, wanting to move, every muscle tensed in preparation, but completely unable to.

 

Because Dr. Cox has a hand at the back of his neck, gaze fixed on the ground, feet shuffling uncharacteristically. He clears his throat after a moment and then gestures lamely at the stairs next to JD. “Can I join you?”

 

Tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth, JD shuffles over on the step so that’s more room. Cox sits down next to him and silence reins for a long, very uncomfortable minute. JD spends the entire time seriously considering bolting his way down the stairs and out into the street where he’ll hopefully be hit by a car.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

JD jerks his head around, caught off guard because he’d just opened his mouth to say the exact same thing.

 

Dr. Cox is looking at him now, eyes hooded, lips pulled down into something of a grimace. “In my defense, I had no idea you were trans,” he adds. “But that doesn’t make up for me being a total ass clown this entire time.”

 

That surprises a bark of laughter out of JD. He shakes his head and can physically feel himself start to relax a little. “I didn’t think you knew,” he says. “I meant to tell you and ask you to knock it off with the girl names but I kept chickening out. I’m sorry for yelling at you in front of everyone. It was just a really bad morning, and then you called me my dead name.”

 

Dr. Cox winces. “I’m really sorry for that one, that’s a total dick move.”

 

“Eh, you didn’t know.”

 

“Still.”

 

“It was really mean, unintentional or not,” JD admits softly. He’s staring at his own hands on his knees now. “Even just your regular name calling sucked a lot too. I got a lot of shit when I was younger for being too feminine, too girly to be a man. Trying to come out when everyone tells you you’re the furthest thing from manly is really, really hard.”

 

A warm hand lands on his shoulder, surprising but also comforting. He can feel the heat of it even through his scrubs and notes dumbly that Dr. Cox has large hands; wide palms, long fingers. Those hands are capable, he knows. He’s seen them in action often enough around the hospital.

 

“I’m sorry, JD.” Cox’s voice is soft and earnest in a way that JD has never heard before. In fact, he’s not sure he’s ever heard the other doctor even call him by his own name before. It’s always been Sheila this or Ginger that.

 

JD shakes himself out of it and shoots Cox a wobbly smile. “Apology accepted. I know you never meant anything by it, not like everyone else did.”

 

Dr. Cox snorts and mutters something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like, “Sure, wasn’t trying to flirt with you or anything.” Then he slaps his thighs and stands up. “Alright Newbie, now that we’ve kissed and made up it’s time to get back to work. Sick patients wait for no doctor.”

 

JD stares after him in shock and then scrambles to his feet and goes to chase the other man down the way a dog chases after their favorite person. “Wait!” he calls, bursting through the stairwell door and zeroing in on Cox’s broad shoulders moving down the hallways.“Wait, what do you mean you were flirting with me? That was really shitty flirting!”

 

He catches up after a moment but has to kind of jog to keep up with Cox’s long strides. “I mean, I still want to be flirted with but man if that was your best attempt then you’re like really, really bad at it.”

 

Dr. Cox shoots him a glare and then slaps a chart into his chest. “Get to work Newbie, we’ll talk about your crush on me later.”

 

JD comes to stop, cradling the chart to his chest and watching Cox disappear around the corner. He furrows his brows. “You’re the one with a crush!” he calls several seconds too late, and then quickly turns around when he sees all the curious heads turn towards him.

 

Great, that’ll be circulating in the gossip mill now too. Despite that he can’t help his big, goofy grin or the way he skips to his next patient’s room.

**Author's Note:**

> come bug me on [tumblr](/%22http://scribespirare.tumblr.com/%22)! i also take requests there!


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